1 in a 100,000!!

In my last post I mentioned I felt horrible, well that was an understatement! That night when Jason came home from work, I had him run me to Urgent Care because my fever was 102 and wouldn't come down. Mom was at the house with Bri so he took me. I waited, and waited, and then waited some more. The doctor came in and asked me if my only symptoms were the fever and headache and I said they were and he told me I needed to take myself to the ER for a lumbar puncture because it sounded like meninigitis! I was like excuse me? He said he could neither confirm nor deny without an LP so I went to the car in tears and told Jason. He took me to the ER and the waiting room was full. I felt like I was gonna pass out when I walked in so I just went and sat down and he filled out all the paperwork for me. This was at 9:00PM. They called me back at around 10 for triage and they took some blood, vitals and started an IV then sent me back to the waiting room. Weird I know, but there were several people in the waiting room in hospital gowns and IVs because they had no available rooms...

At midnight, they came for me, finally! And the doctor said my white cell count was super high and that he needed to do the LP to confirm meningitis. They gave me a saline bag and antibiotics in my IV, then a little morphine and then he started. I was super frightened because I just had an epidural and it was no fun! This was no fun either. He stuck the needle in to numb me and that hurt like hell! Then when he was doing the actual withdrawal of spinal fluid, I said I felt like I was gonna pass out then I did. Fortunately I was laying down but it freaked Jason out. The test results were inconclusive until the cultures could be examined in 24-48 hours so they admitted me at 6am. Jason went home to get some sleep and I passed out once in my room.

I spent another weekend in the hospital! Our anniversary weekend! And yes, I did have meningitis. Viral meningits, not the bad one that can kill you, but still bad enough. They discharged me yesterday morning but I had to go back to get another IV of antibiotic this morning and possibly again tomorrow morning. I've been so pumped full of antibiotics these last few days... and vicodin! I was under isolation until Monday morning which meant that everyone who came in my room had to have a mask on. I felt like a leper. And to keep Brianne safe, she has been at my parents house since Saturday morning and I miss her so much! She will be home with her mommy and daddy tomorrow though.

I had been afraid to google meninigitis because I didn't want to read all the bad scary stuff about it. But Jason googled it and it says it can be caught from mosquito bights... Also, the virus that causes it also causes the common cold but in either case, it's like only 1 in 100,000 people actually get viral meningitis so go figure. I had only ever spent the night in the hospital, as a patient, once before this year and that was when I was 4 and had my tonsils removed. This year alone I have had 5 separate stays in hospitals (and that's not counting spending the night with Bri in the hospital). I think I'm due for a break at this point.

Since I still feel like crap and have a pounding headache (and will have for about another week or two) I'm going to crash on the couch (since I won't be able to do this once Bri is home). I just really really hope she doesn't get sick, if she does, I'll never forgive myself.

I feel horrible...

I woke up this morning with a fever and throbbing, pounding headache. So I have stayed home from work but being sick isn't why I feel so horrible. Jason just left for work and he took Brianne to daycare. I feel like a bad mom!! I'm home and she isn't here with me! This is the first time in 5 months I've been home alone and I should be in bed, resting up, trying to feel better but instead, I'm crying and worrying and typing this. I know that I feel too bad to have taken care of Bri by myself today and I really really don't want her to get my cold. But she has that ear infection and is taking antibiotics so maybe that will protect her... I don't want to take any chances though. And the worst part is that when I was changing her diaper and getting her dressed for daycare, she was laying on the floor on her blankie and started coughing, no big deal since she has had this cough for a while now. But then the cough got worse and she got real red, so I rolled her onto her side in case something came up so she wouldn't aspirate it. Well sure enough, she started throwing up (or spitting up) alot! I didn't even have her diaper on her but I picked her up and she threw up all over me and just kept coughing and coughing. Finally, she stopped and caught her breath and there were little tears in her eyes and she was red and made this sad little whimper... So now I feel very terrible about her going to daycare and me staying home. I am not going to be able to rest now because I'll be worrying about her. And since we only have one car, I can't go and get her... But before they left, she did start smiling and playing with her feet so that must mean she feels better right?

She'll be okay at daycare right? They will check on her if she starts coughing like that again right? I called my mom and she said she will come and get her out of daycare when she gets off at 2 so she won't be there as long. I feel like since I'm a mom I shouldn't show weakness but that's how I feel, weak. How can I make myself stop worrying about her? And Jason has been sick too and he hasn't missed any work but here I am at home! And our first anniversary is this weekend and we had made big plans for tomorrow but now with me being sick I don't know if we'll do anything but lay around the house, all of us being sick. And this being home alone business has given me flashbacks of being on bedrest already. Who would have ever thought that staying home from work sick would make me feel so much worse. I need to rest...

False Positives!

As you know Brianne had her cardiologist and vascular surgery appointment yesterday and we got good news all around! The cardiologist did another EKG and it too showed there were problems with Bri's heart. Well the cardiologist came in to talk to us and said that after reviewing her echo results from when she was in the ER he's determined the 3 EKG tests were producing false positives and that her heart was strong and healthy! He said he did detect a very slight murmur but he's not worried about it and if anyone asks to tell them she doesn't have one, that's how slight it is. And since we've heard such great things about Dr Hirsch, everyone says he's the best, I feel 100 times better. He does want to see us back in 6 months for another echo and a follow up just to be absolutely certain, but he doesn't forsee any problems. Yay!!

Then at her appointment with the vascular surgeon, the doctors were all totally shocked to see how improved her hemangioma is. They said she does not need surgery and actually told us "good job" for taking such good care of it. We follow up with them in 3 months but they too do not forsee any further problems. Woohoo!

And to top it all off, we qualified for a state program called BCMH which is for parents of children with medical handicaps (or potential medical handicaps). We are now part of their treatment plan which will pay all of our out-of-pocket expenses for the next 3 months (which means I didn't have to pay the two separate $50 copays yesterday) and anything our insurance won't pay they handle! It's about time we got some assistance!!

So now I must wake the sweet pea and get ready for work but I leave you with her 5 month sticky pic picture!

The Big Appointment

Today Brianne has her appointment with the cardiologist... I'm nervous! My heart and soul tell me that she is perfectly healthy - she's happy, eating good, growing and gaining weight, hitting milestones like a full term baby, but there's that lingering fear. I mean, what new mom wouldn't be scared hearing that her perfect baby may have a problem with her heart? I think I'll rest better after talking with the cardiologist though, hopefully he will put all my fears to rest. And according to our doctor, the cardiologist we are seeing is one of the best. His calender was full through the end of October but luckily he was able to squeeze us in. After the cardiologist appointment we have an appointment at the Vascular Malformation clinic so the hemanigioma surgeon can check out Brianne's birthmark and decide if surgery is still needed. I don't think it is necessary any more because it is healing great now that we are keeping it covered. And I don't want her to have surgery unless it is absolutely necessary.

So my mom will be here to pick us up then we are going downtown to meet Jason for lunch and then I'm going to take Brianne to meet all the people we work with. I very rarely get an opportunity where I'm off on a work day so this is a rare event. I sent everyone an email last week telling them we'd be bringing the baby by so everyone is excited to see her. I wanted to try to get her an appointment to see her regular pediatrician today too because she is still so congested from her ear infection and still has a horrible cough. It's usually worse in the morning too and there were a few days that she threw up on me. But I guess if you're a baby that's the only way to get rid of it since they can't spit.

We had a big weekend with the little one too. Sunday we went to a BBQ at Jason's cousin's house. Brianne was so excited about being in new surroundings with new faces to look at she refused to nap. The weather was perfect too and she loves being outside! Then yesterday Jennifer, Tara and Susan (grandma) came over to visit. Unfortunately they got to meet grumpy Bri though. Since she slept very little on Sunday she was trying to make up for it yesterday. And when she's asleep, you don't wake her. We joke about not waking the sleeping beast lol. We went to lunch and she was asleep in her car seat when we got there but woke up while we were eating and I guess she was scared or startled because she just started screaming and crying. I had to get up and walk around the restaurant with her till she finally calmed down. But she did eventually wake up and show them some smiles before they left.

Next weekend is mine and Jason's first anniversary! We are going to go kayaking on Saturday after dropping Bri off at my parent's house. I can't wait! We haven't been since our honeymoon and so I'm hoping for some good weather. Then, the weekend of the 24th we are taking our first vacation as a family! We are going to spend the long weekend at Lake Norris in Tennessee with Aunt Wendy, Tom, Jennifer, Tara, Amber, AJ, Devin and Aiden. Tom has a house on the lake and boats and a jet ski and it should be a blast. I can't wait for a little rest and relaxation too, and I've never been on a jet ski before! Jennifer has a little life jacket that was Tara's that should fit Bri so she can go boating with us. I will of course post tons of pics after we get home.

Brianne is waking up and I have to get us both ready for our day so I'll update after the doctor's appointments. Keep your fingers crossed for us.